


Jaime's First Day;

by robotsdance



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Belinda Blinked AU, Business and Leadership, F/F, F/M, Jaime/potentially anyone in the pots and pans industry, M/M, Multi, doing my best to channel Rocky Flintstone, not a single braincell was used in the writing of this fic, not one!, of the My Dad Wrote a Porno podcast fame, you know how it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:07:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 14,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28584732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robotsdance/pseuds/robotsdance
Summary: It's Jaime's first day in his new job at Stark Pots and Pans.
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Comments: 276
Kudos: 108





	1. Going Up!

**Author's Note:**

> If you are familiar with the _My Dad Wrote A Porno_ podcast, you already know that _Belinda Blinked_ are the best/worst erotic novels/business and leadership guides ever written about the pots and pans industry. If you are not familiar with _Belinda Blinked_ , you need to know that the Belinda Blinked literary universe is a singular achievement by Rocky Flintstone that contains adult themes, sexual content, and strong language (basically all the good stuff) and I highly recommend it. I am doing my best to channel the writing style and chaotic energy of the original works (an impossible but enjoyable goal). As such, I have done no research! I have not thought this through! I am already full of regret!
> 
> angel_deux has volunteered to take 15% of the blame for this and I am sprinkling some blame on slipsthrufingers and sameboots as well. All of them encouraged this for some reason.

Jaime stepped into the elevator and pushed the button for the twelfth floor. Stark Pots and Pans occupied the whole building but Jaime’s new office was on the twelfth floor. All of the senior management team had their offices on the twelfth floor. This was his very first day as the Senior Sales Director.

He’d never had a senior management position before. His previous job as a guard of the infamous Lannister Cookware Vault, where all of Lannister Cookware’s most important corporate secrets were kept, was not on the same level as the job he was riding the elevator towards.

He was wearing a nice suit to honour this occasion, with dark green silk boxer briefs beneath and a thong beneath those. This was his first day on the job and he did not know what to expect, so he had thought he best be prepared for all opportunities that may come his way. At Lannister Cookware Jaime had always worn a gold thong, but he didn’t think that was appropriate for his new position with Stark Pots and Pans so he was wearing a tasteful charcoal grey thong today instead.

For his job interview with Stark Pots and Pans Jaime hadn’t worn any underwear at all. He was certain this helped him land the job, but he couldn’t assume that all of his meetings would be like that one. This was business after all. Anything could happen.

The elevator came to a halt on the third floor and a man with a cane and a crooked smile stepped on and said “‘Morning” before he pushed a button for the fourth floor.

“Hi!” Jaime said as the elevator doors closed and they began to rise. “My name is Jaime Lannister and I am the new senior sales director of Stark Pots and Pans.”

The elevator stopped and the door opened. The man hobbled off the elevator and managed to reply, “Good look on your first day” before the doors closed between them.

Jaime laughed.

He didn’t need luck. This was business. He had a knack for it, even if he had spent his life infuriating his father by refusing to rise to the top of the sales ranks at Lannister Cookware. Instead Jaime had committed himself to his guard duties. His father had hated him for it and spent years trying to convince him to take a sales position, but Jaime refused. Then Jaime had lost his right hand and his father had dismissed his odds of ever being a successful businessman. “Who will buy cookware from a man without his cooking hand?!” his father had shouted.

His father had died (suspiciously) last year. Both Jaime’s brother Tyrion and his sister Cersei suspected the other of having a hand in it, though neither had enough evidence to convict the other. Instead they were locked in a vicious power struggle for control of Lannister Cookware, each of them vying for Jaime to sell his share to one of them to give them the upper hand. After months of hoping they would figure something out Jaime had grown tired of being torn between them. He sold all his shares publicly, quit his job, and applied to work at Stark Pots and Pans.

Yes, he thought as he glanced around the elevator and thought of his siblings fighting over business assets, he had made the right choice.

On the eighth floor the elevator stopped again and a young woman wearing glasses and a friendly smile joined him.

“Hi!” Jaime said. “My name is Jaime Lannister and I am the new senior sales director of Stark Pots and Pans! Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Isn’t that lucky,” the woman replied. “I am Pia. I am the assistant to one of the other senior executives at Stark Pots and Pans. I’d be happy to show you to your new office.”

“That would be great,” Jaime said as the doors to the twelfth floor opened. His first day just kept getting better and better.

“This is the twelfth floor,” Pia said as they stepped off the elevator. “Your office is this way.”

She led him to the left towards the corner office, introducing him to the people they passed along the way. The door to his office already had his name on it and when he opened it he got to admire the view from the window and the three potted plants in the corner across from his large mahogany desk.

“Is there anything else you’ll be wanting Mr. Lannister?” Pia asked hopefully.

“No thank you Pia.” Jaime wasn’t the sort to involve himself with assistants. It was bad business and Jaime had seen how Pia and Peck had smiled at each other as they had walked by, but there was no harm in letting Pia admire him to thank her for her kindness on his first day.

Jaime opened the lower drawer of his new desk and bent over, lingering so Pia got a good look at his ass.

Jaime had a fantastic ass. Everyone thought so.

“Wow!” Pia said. “You have a great ass!”

Jaime laughed.

“You’ll fit right in here,” Pia said. “Please drop by my desk sometime to say hello.”

“Will do,” Jaime said. “Thank you for all of your help.”

After Pia left Jaime looked around. There was space on the wall for a picture or three, and he would have to put up his framed business qualifications soon, but that could wait.

Jaime sat in his ergonomic leather desk chair with 12 adjustable metrics and a built-in back massager and allowed himself a minute to drink it all in.

His mahogany desk already had a silver pen holder on it and a sleek iron rolodex. A rolodex! Jaime thought. He’d never had a rolodex before.

He thought of the man he’d met on the elevator and realized he must get his name so he could add him to his rolodex.

Jaime laughed.

His first day was already going swimmingly.

But now it was time to get down to business


	2. The Sales Team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime meets his assistant and reviews the files of his new sales team.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would it be a Belinda Blinked AU without boring admin chapters? Absolutely not.

There was a knock on the door so Jaime said “Come in” and the person did.

“Hello,” the young man said. “My name is Peck and I am your assistant.”

“Pleased to meet you,” Jaime said, extending his left hand to shake Peck’s. Peck had been one of the people Jaime had been introduced to in passing, but it was important to have a formal introduction to the people he would be working closely with. “How long have you been with the company?”

“Three years this summer,” Peck said. “I brought you the files on your sales team. I thought you’d like to have a look at them before the scheduled meeting.”

“Yes thank you,” Jaime said. He had a 10 o’clock meeting with his new sales team and he wanted to know what he was dealing with before they walked into the room.

Peck handed Jaime the files and then said, “I will be at my desk. Just give me a shout if you need anything. If you pick up the phone on the desk it goes straight to me. Dial 1 and then an extension to call numbers within the building and dial 9 to call an outside number.”

“Thank you,” Jaime said. He had not investigated the phone on his desk yet.

With that Peck turned away from Jaime and gave a little half bow before he left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

Jaime returned to his desk with the three personal files, each in a blue folder, and the latest sales report, which was spiral bound with a clear plastic cover, and lay them out in front of him.

Jaime, as the Senior Sales Director, had three Regional Sales Managers working beneath him. According to the files he now had open on his mahogany desk, their names were Jon Snow, Renly Baratheon, and Brynden Tully. All of whom Jaime had encountered either directly or indirectly over his time in the business, despite his efforts to stay on the edges until recently.

Jaime had never met Renly, but based on reputation he was either a sweetheart or an asshole, with no one having an opinion between those extremes. Renly’s sales numbers weren’t the worst Jaime had ever seen, but they were far from good. There was a lot of room for improvement and Jaime was confident that with some coaching Renly could have much better numbers next quarter.

Jaime had met Jon Snow once, back when Jon was just getting out of college and they had both been at one of the many kitchenware functions with their powerhouse families. At the time Jon had been pondering whether to go into the family business, and had admitted as much to Jaime when the two of them found themselves out of the hustle and bustle of the party. Jaime had advised Jon against it. The cookware industry was vicious, at once unpredictable and steadfast. Jaime had already been in the family business for a number of years at that point and he knew better than most it was not for everyone.

It seemed Jon had decided it was for him. Jaime wondered if Jon still thought so. With the exception of Robb who was working overseas in one of the international branches, all of the other Stark children had avoided joining the family business.

Jaime read over Jon’s sales numbers. They were all over the map. Sometimes he brought in huge sales and sometimes there were huge droughts. It was not the kind of consistent performance Jaime would be looking for in a regional sales manager. Jaime knew he would have his work cut out for him.

That brought Jaime to Brynden Tully, or as he liked to be called, the Blackfish. He was more of a wildcard, not someone Jaime had encountered personally very much, but he had heard the stories. He had spent his years at Stark Pots and Pans bouncing from department to department, but not excelling at any of them, and now he was back in sales once again. His sales numbers were just shy of dreadful. He was better in his prime, Jaime mused as he flipped through the report. The last few years Brynden’s sales numbers had been sliding drastically.

Jaime could see why they didn’t promote any of the junior sales staff and hired him instead, but he had to wonder how they would react to having to take orders from a new person, specifically him, a Lannister.

Jaime supposed he would find out at ten o’clock when they had their first scheduled meeting.

But then the door to his office opened and Regional Sales Manager Brynden Tully stepped inside.


	3. The Blackfish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime meets the Blackfish before the scheduled Regional Sales Managers meeting.

“The regional sales meeting is at 10am,” Jaime said, wondering if Bynden had been given the wrong information. These sort of things happened, especially if a team was not properly managed.

“I’m not here for the regional sales meeting,” Brynden said as he closed the door behind him. “I’m here to meet you.”

He did not look happy about this, but Jaime knew it was his job as Senior Sales Director to work with his junior staff, no matter how much they did not like him. The future of Stark Pots and Pans depended on their ability to sell the excellent products. If his sales team didn’t improve, they would never get the new line of pots and pans into enough shops to be in millions of homes for generations to come.

Jaime stood and walked around his impressive desk to offer Brynden his hand, “Jaime Lannister, Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans.”

“I know who you are,” Brynden growled.

“And I know who you are,” Jaime replied easily. “I will be happy to discuss my thoughts on the matter at our first one-on-one personal development meeting, but we can get a head start now. I still have your file open. I’d be happy to give you some first impressions.”

“I don’t want your first impressions. Or your fourth impressions. I don’t know what possessed the higher-ups to pick you of all people for this job, but I wanted to meet you beforehand to say that I don’t trust you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re a Lannister!” he spat. “A Lannister of Lannister Cookware! And before you tell me that you sold your shares, I know you did. Everyone in the building knows it! And we still don’t trust you. For all I know it’s just a cover to get you in here so you can play double agent and go crawling back to your sister with all of our sales numbers and confidential development prototype information! For all I know you could be bugged right now!”

“Would you like to check?” Jaime asked, already removing his suit jacket. “By all means.”

Jaime draped his jacket onto his desk and then loosened his tie and undid the top button of his shirt. Clearly he was taking too long by Brynden’s watch, because the Blackfish stepped forward and took over, undoing Jaime’s shirt and then tugging it free from where it was tucked into Jaime’s trousers.

Jaime removed his shirt and placed it carefully beside his jacket on his desk in such a way that it would not wrinkle while the Blackfish looked him over. It was clear the Blackfish was enjoying it, and why wouldn’t he? Jaime was quite the specimen, with golden skin and a muscular build, not to mention his luscious golden hair.

“No wires or bugs,” Jaime said, trailing his fingers down his bare chest for good measure. “Satisfied?”

“Not even a little,” Brynden said as he reached for Jaime’s belt.

Before long Jaime was standing completely naked in front of one of his regional sales managers who was still fully clothed. There were, of course, no wires or bugs on Jaime’s god-like body. Not even a tattoo for the man to find upon his naked flesh. Brynden walked all the way around Jaime to be sure, pausing as he was behind him for a second or four, before then stopping in front of him.

“I still don’t trust you,” Brynden said as he knelt in front of him and then took Jaime’s cock into his mouth.

Jaime looked down at him with slight bewilderment. Was this some new corporate trust exercise? It was not one Jaime had ever encountered at the seminars, but he had to admit it was a pleasant alternative to falling backwards into a teammate's arms. And this version did require him to demonstrate his trust in Brynden, especially when he used his teeth to scrape along the sensitive skin of his shaft, making Jaime hiss as the Blackfish continued to work Jaime’s now hard cock.

If the Blackfish was half as confident selling pots and pans as he was sucking cock, he’d be the top salesman in the seven kingdoms! Jaime thought. He was happily brainstorming the various ways to help Brynden unlock his true selling potential when he came with a happy little groan.

Brynden stood, and Jaime wondered if it was his turn. Trust needs to go both ways after all! And the Blackfish’s cod was obviously interested in this transaction.

“I’ll see you at 10 o’clock,” Brynden said as he turned and left without another word.

It was probably for the best, Jaime thought as he picked up his thong first and pulled it on. He twisted his hips slightly to make sure the thong was comfortably settled before he reached for his boxer-briefs. Business was hard work, and he had to earn the trust of his colleagues, which he would, all in good time.

Jaime was just buttoning up his shirt when the phone on his desk rang.


	4. The Ol' Water Cooler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime goes in search of the water cooler and finds more than just refreshment.

“Mr. Lannister?” It was Peck, Jaime’s assistant, on the other end of the phone.

“Speaking.” Jaime said. He held the phone to his ear with his right shoulder while he finished doing up the buttons of his shirt with his left hand. He decided not to put his suit jacket back on yet, but he did hang it on a hook on the wall with a padded clothes hanger.

“Dr. Stark has scheduled a meeting with you for 3:30 this afternoon in her office. I wanted to make sure you had it on your personal calendar,” Peck said.

Dr. Catelyn Stark was the CEO of Stark Pots and Pans and she had a Ph.D. in Relative Business Strategies and she was very good at what she did. She had built Stark Pots and Pans up to a kitchenware powerhouse capable of competing with Lannister Cookware on the world stage. An impressive feat! Dr. Stark had been one of the three people at Jaime’s final interview for the position of Senior Sales Director. She had not spoken to him beyond the required business pleasantries and her demeanour with him had been cool, but given the long and merciless war over the market that their families had waged for longer than Jaime had been alive, he had expected nothing less.

“3:30 this afternoon,” Jaime repeated as he made a note of it. He wouldn’t forget such an important meeting, but he liked the look of the note “Dr. Stark— 3:30” in his day planner.

“Anything else you need?” Peck asked.

“No thank you Peck!” Then Jaime hung up the phone. He was going to enjoy having an assistant as on the ball as Peck was. He could tell.

After a few minutes of sitting at his desk and looking over the minutes from the branch meeting last month, he stood up. He wanted to stretch his legs before his 10 o’clock meeting with his sales team. Sales meetings were unpredictable at best, and who knew how long or vigorous this one would be.

He picked up his Stark Pots and Pans branded coffee mug and went in search of the water cooler.

“I can do that for you!” Peck said when he saw Jaime emerge from his office. He stood up as he said this and the multicoloured folders in his hands threatening to spill their contents all over the carpeted floor.

“No no,” Jaime dismissed him with a wave of his prosthetic hand. “I assure you I’m quite capable of this task and many others. And I want to get the lay of the land.”

This was the twelfth floor after all. He best know his way around it as soon as possible!

Peck nodded and sat back down and Jaime strode off down the hall.

Not long after Jaime began his quest he found a water cooler near the south-west corner of the building. There was a small area with coffee and tea and various pastries and fruit beside the water cooler, but it was nothing like the lavish complementary food Lannister Cookware provided its executive staff. Stark Pots and Pans didn’t even have a shaker of edible gold flakes for their cappuccino machine! Jaime hadn’t even worked on the executive level there, but he had had enough Lannister company meals prepared by five star chefs for a lifetime. It was nice to be working for a more down-to-earth company, he mused as he filled his mug with cold water from the blue-handled spout, enjoying the way the trickling water splashed into his company mug.

Jaime could really get used to this, he thought as he took a sip of water and then turned on his heel to go back to his office.

However, instead of confidently walking back to his office, he confidently walked right into someone instead, splashing his mug of water down his front.

“Are you all right?” a very tall very strong woman in an immaculately fitted business suit asked him.

Jaime looked at her first. The exquisite fabric encasing the woman and projecting a strong self of business capabilities and style was dry. Then he looked down. The front of his shirt was wet. A patch of water had turned the thin white fabric of his shirt transparent like a wet t-shirt contest, putting his nipple down to his second ab on his right side on display.

“Quite alright,” Jaime said. “Though I do apologize. I suppose it wouldn’t be a first day on the job without something like this happening. My name is Jaime and I am the new Senior Sales Director. And this is my right nipple.” he added with a gesture towards where it was making its presence known in response to the cold water it had been showered in.

“Nice to meet you both,” the woman said. “I’m Brienne. I’m in—” 

“You’re Brienne Tarth!” Jaime exclaimed, nearly spilling what little remained of the water in his mug down the other side of his dress shirt. “In Marketing! Your holiday ad campaign boosted sales by 23%!”

He’d heard about Brienne, and not just from her campaigns and the blurb in Kitchenware Quarterly about the up-and-coming stars in the industry. The article hadn’t included a picture of her, but he should have recognized her on sight anyway. Word got around in their line of work, and everyone who had worked with her or been lucky enough to sit in on one of her pitches or meetings knew she was all business. And the woman in front of him was _all business_.

“The very same,” she replied, but there was a whispering echo of a smile on her face. The kind that made him know she enjoyed her excellent business sense being appreciated.

“Your holiday campaign was a work of genius,” Jaime gushed, unable to help himself. His siblings had screamed at each other all over the holiday dinner the three of them still endured for the sake of tradition about how they’d been outsmarted by a marketing team working with a fraction of the Lannister team’s budget. And now she was here in front of him.

“Thank you,” Brienne Tarth, Marketing Executive replied as she stepped over to the coffee maker.

“I’d love to hear about it sometime,” Jaime said. He had a real knack for business, but he’d never learned much about marketing. “About how you came up with it.”

“I can do you one better,” Brienne replied as she added sugar to her own Stark Pots and Pans mug. “I’m presenting this year’s Smith Day Sale campaign this afternoon for approval. You’re welcome to sit in if you like.”

“I’d love to,” Jaime said professionally.

“Good,” she said as she tossed the stir stick from her coffee into the trash can and started to walk back to wherever she needed to be. “2 o’clock. Your assistant will make sure you find it.”

It took Jaime a minute to collect himself enough to refill his mug with crisp purified water before he headed back to his office for his meeting with his regional sales managers.

On his way back to his office Jaime told Peck about the marketing meeting Brienne had invited him to. Peck nodded and added it to his schedule. Mercifully there were no conflicting meetings, but even if there were, there were few things Jaime wouldn’t push back an hour to get to sit in on a marketing presentation from Brienne Tarth.

Jaime returned to his office invigorated from his brief walk, the cold water, and his chance meeting with Brienne Tarth. He began to do his pre-sales meeting stretches and knee bends to channel this extra burst of energy. He knew he would need it when his sales team arrived.


	5. The Regional Sales Team Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime has his first meeting with the regional sales managers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to slipsthrufingers who continues to read the drafts of this fic as it progresses and provides valuable input on the world of pots and pans.

At ten o’clock Jaime picked up the phone in his office and asked Peck to send in his regional sales team. Renly walked in first like it was his corner office he was strutting into and not Jaime’s. Brynden followed him, glaring at Jaime the whole time. Jaime knew without question that Brynden still did not trust him at all, despite their previous encounter. Jaime was half-certain the Blackfish was blinking in morse code something to that effect, but he was not concerned. Trust, like sales, had to be earned, and Jaime was more than up to the task.

Jon Snow shuffled into the room last. His eyes were huge and sad and his sweater-vest was eye-catching with a subtle diamond pattern upon it. He was compelling enough as a regional sales manager, but Jaime could see why his sales have been inconsistent if this is how he carried himself around potential clients.

Once his three regional sales managers were settled Jaime cleared his throat and began his opening remarks:

“Hello. I am Jaime Lannister and I am your new Senior Sales Director. As you all know, I am a Lannister, formally of Lannister Cookware, however, as you also know, I am now the Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans. And though I worked for Lannister Cookware for many years, I was never on the sales team. But now I am on a sales team: your sales team. So let’s talk sales.”

“Is this really necessary?” Renly asked. His arms were crossed over his chest.

“Your numbers last quarter suggest that it is,” Jaime replied.

Renly frowned, but did not interrupt again as Jaime steered the conversation to the annual sales report. 

After 20 minutes of spirited discussion, Jaime had confirmed many of his early impressions about his regional sales managers.

For starters, Renly’s thong was a gaudy thing. Far too high cut above his prominent hip bones and with rhinestones bedazzling it in such a haphazard way that Jaime suspected Renly did it himself. No wonder his clients had trouble taking him seriously. Jaime would have to look into the clothing expenses budget, because something needed to be done.

Brynden was stubborn. He didn’t seem very interested in the dance that a good sales exchange could be, he just wanted to say his short script and be done with it. No wonder clients weren’t responding. Where was the personal touch that let clients know that they mattered? That these pots and pans mattered? There was much work to be done. 

And Jon was overly-cautious, though once he had removed his shirt and started talking about the patented non-stick coating on the fall line of Stark frying pans, Jaime saw flashes of his true potential as a regional sales manager.

Jaime decided it was best to spend some of their time this morning on sales role-plays, taking turns as clients, so that is what they did.

Soon Renly was lying on his side across Jaime’s desk wearing nothing but his flashy thong and his matching socks. He seemed quite convinced that his sales strategy required no additional improvement. Jaime would certainly have his work cut out for him during their one-on-one development meetings over the coming weeks.

Jon was leaning over Jaime’s desk, intently pretending it was a cooktop as Jaime stood behind him, reaching around him to guide his wrist to test the superior balance of the Stark brand frying pan in his hand. Jon was responding well to the instruction. Jaime would make a good sales manager out of him yet!

The Blackfish was still stuck in his ways, but he was beginning to open up. Soon he was begrudgingly joining in on a discussion about bold new strategies as they paused the more hand-on parts of the role-playing exercises to enjoy the coffee Peck had delivered while everyone took turns fondling Jaime’s lean muscular upper body. That was when Renly mentioned that there was a client meeting scheduled today.

“There’s a meeting with a client today?” Jaime asked, his knees nearly buckling from the shock of it. This was the first he was hearing of this! He doubled-checked his daily itinerary and his calendar and there was no mention of anyone on his sales team having a meeting with a client today. “Which of you is meeting with them?”

Then Jaime watched as his three Regional Sales Managers mumbled about not having decided who would be taking the meeting yet.

“What time?” Jaime demanded.

“Lunch.”

Jaime couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His regional sales team had a meeting in less than an hour’s time and they did not know which of them would be taking the meeting?! Outrageous! No wonder their numbers were what they were and thank gods Jaime was here.

“I’ll take the client meeting today,” Jaime said, cutting off the chorus of poor excuses. What better way to inspire his team and get the ball rolling on some outstanding sales than to take the meeting himself. With that he announced that this, their first ever regional sales meeting was at an end. 

“They are difficult clients to please,” Jon said quietly, more to the pile of his neatly folded clothes in the corner than to his sales director as Renly and Brynden picked up their discarded garments and left the room. 

Jaime laughed. 

Jaime loved to please tricky clients.


	6. Lucky Strokes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime attends a business lunch.

After Jon had also left his office, Jaime asked Peck to find out where the sales meeting he would be having shortly was. Peck, once again proving his excellent skills at such things, returned to Jaime’s office not long after with the details.

The meeting was with Oberyn Martell and Ellaria Sand. Oberyn and Ellaria were buyers for a huge chain of shops in Dorne and Jaime knew for a fact that they had no love for Lannister Cookware. Cersei and Tyrion had been trying to get their sales teams to land big deals in Dorne for years with no success. Only a few small dealers in Dorne would buy Lannister products, and the ones who did only bought negligible quantities. If Stark Pots and Pans could land a deal with Oberyn and Ellaria they could easily dominate that corner of the market and Lannister Cookware would be left struggling to play catch up for years.

And here he had the chance to make it happen on his very first day! Jaime was so pleased. His conditional annual big bonus would be a sure thing if he had a few more strokes of luck like this.

When Jaime asked Peck where the meeting was, he was expecting to be told it was in one of the many impressive meeting rooms in the Stark Pots and Pans building. He was surprised to be told that the meeting would take place at The Horny Toad, a local restaurant, instead.

“I have arranged a company driver for you,” Peck added. “He will meet you out in front of the building in 15 minutes.”

“Thank you Peck,” Jaime said as he blew him a kiss gratefully. “Helpful as always!”

“My pleasure!” Peck said before he left Jaime alone in his office.

Jaime used those fifteen minutes to look up any additional information about Oberyn and Ellaria and the Dornish cookware market that would help him during his sales pitch. Then he put on his suit jacket, straightened his thong, and then walked over to the elevator.

He was alone on the elevator from the 12th floor to the 9th, but on the 8h floor the elevator stopped and the doors opened. One of the two people waiting for the elevator he did not recognize. The other was Brienne Tarth, Marketing Executive.

“Going up?” Brienne asked. She had a flogger in her right hand with a frying pan handle instead of a regular one. Jaime wondered where she had gotten it. Jaime also wondered which lucky souls had just been in a business meeting with her on the 8th floor.

“Down,” Jaime replied apologetically as the other woman who was waiting with Brienne joined him in the elevator and hit the button for the 2nd floor and the elevator doors closed between him and Brienne.

“I’m Lysa,” the woman said as they slid past the 7th floor.

“I’m Jaime and I’m—”

“The new sales director!” Lysa exclaimed, bouncing in excitement where she stood. Her ample breasts bounced with her and Jaime found himself pondering if the rumours about elevators getting stuck if people jumped up and down in them were true. “Is today your first day?”

“It is,” Jaime confirmed. “And I’m on my way to my first meeting with clients.”

“Oh wow!” Lysa said. Then she cupped her breasts and hoisted them towards Jaime. “For luck?”

What’s the harm? Jaime thought. He didn’t need luck (this was business!) but he turned around and grabbed the railing on the wall of the elevator and then bent over to present his remarkable ass to Lysa.

Lysa leaned down and rubbed her tits across his plump buttocks as the elevator continued its descent. This continued until the elevator came to a stop on the second floor. Lysa stood up, stepped off the elevator and waved goodbye as the elevator doors closed and took him the rest of the way to the ground floor.

The restaurant the driver dropped Jaime off at was a more down-to-earth dining establishment than Jaime was expecting. Lannister Cookware client meetings were always in five star establishments if they were at a restaurant, and The Horny Toad was not that. It was more the sort of place Jaime expected friends to have a casual meal at before a movie or a round of mini golf than to close a big business deal, but this was where he had been told to go. For the first time he wondered if there wasn’t a sales meeting at all. Perhaps this was his Regional Sales Manager’s idea of a first day prank for him. But as soon as Jaime stepped inside and said he was there for Stark Pots and Pans, he was led over to a circular booth in the corner.

Both Oberyn and Ellaria were already there, though given the fact that their water glasses on the table were bone dry, it was obvious they had only just arrived. Both of them stood to greet him and then indicated for Jaime to follow Oberyn into the booth. Ellaria followed Jaime instead of sitting in the chair set up opposite the curved booth, which meant that Oberyn, Jaime, and Ellaria all had a good view of the restaurant from where they sat side by side and looked at their menus.

The three of them exchanged pleasantries until their waiter came and poured water into their three glasses and took their orders

Ellaria ordered the oysters with a side of fries, Oberyn ordered perogies with chocolate sauce and asparagus, and Jaime ordered the toad in the hole, which the menu boasted as the restaurant’s speciality so he knew he was in for a treat. 

The waiter then took their menus away and returned with their bottle of champagne and poured them each a glass. Before Jaime could pivot the conversation to the business at hand, Ellaria spoke.

“Tell me Jaime Lannister,” she said as she slid her finger down his silk tie. “Tell me why you, of all people, are here as the sale representative from Stark Pots and Pans.”

That was an easy question to answer, “I am the new senior sales director of Stark Pots and Pans.”

“Is that so?” Oberyn asked, as he leaned in to kiss Jaime’s neck as his hand followed Ellaria’s down Jaime’s chest.

“It is,” Jaime replied.

“And in your opinion,” Ellaria said as she reached for his belt, “Stark Pots and Pans are the superior choice?”

“Yes. The quality of our products is exceptional.”

“I do hope you came prepared to discuss this,” Oberyn added as he rubbed his palm against Jaime’s bulge. “At length.”

“Of course,” Jaime said. “It will be as thorough a discussion as you would like.”

“Very thorough I should think,” Ellaria said. “Wouldn’t you say so darling?”

“Definitely,” Oberyn agreed.

It was Ellaria who kissed Jaime first and Oberyn who kissed him second. The two of them took turns alternating between kissing Jaime and unbuttoning his shirt, while Jaime alternated between kissing them and telling them all of the key features of the Stark’s current kitchenware lineup. When Jaime moved to help with a particularly tricky button Oberyn was the one to lay his hand on Jaime’s wrist and say, “Let us take care of this.”

So Jaime did, though he did use his one hand to stroke up and down Ellaria’s thigh as he talked about the quality construction of the pots and pans in a way that she seemed to enjoy, based on the way she moaned into the contact. Jaime lamented only having one hand with which to dedicate to such a task. He should have liked to be able to touch Oberyn in the same way at the same time, but he made up for it by deepening his next kiss with Oberyn, inviting his tongue into his mouth like a long overdue houseguest. Oberyn seemed to like this a lot.

When Jaime’s shirt was fully unbuttoned with only his silk tie hanging down the middle of his bare chest, Ellaria undid the zipper of Jaime’s trousers as she licked circles around his left nipple while Oberyn reached for Jaime’s penis.

Jaime felt Oberyn slip his hand into the Y-front of his boxer-briefs, but instead of finding his cock, he stopped and leaned in closer to Ellaria and said, “Come see.”

Ellaria pulled away from Jaime’s nipple to look at the charcoal grey of Jaime’s thong showing through the opening in his boxer-briefs.

“So thoughtful,” she said in awe. Then she reached into the gap in the fabric of his boxers that Oberyn was holding open and carefully pushed Jaime’s thong aside to free his cock.

The way they both smiled at him then made Jaime’s heart sing a song of triumph. He knew a sale was a sure thing now, the rest was just gravy, how many units and when, which products specifically. That sort of thing.

As Oberyn and Ellaria took turns stroking his cock and they began to discuss the finer points of the sale between sips of champagne, Jaime wondered if their meal would come before he did.

He hoped it did, but the way they were both smirking at him made him doubt it.


	7. Between a Photocopier/Fax Machine and a Hard Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime goes to photocopy some documents.

On the way back from the restaurant Jaime had the driver stop so he could get an ice cream cone to celebrate. He’d just closed a huge sale (50000 units with an option for even more before the holiday season!) he had definitely earned the delicious cotton candy frozen yogurt with candy sprinkles he was now happily enjoying in the backseat of the company car.

After a good business sale everyone should walk away from it satisfied, and Jaime was certain that all three of them had walked away from that booth at The Horny Toad highly satisfied. He had made sure of it. And Stark Pots and Pans were sure to be satisfied by the sale he had just made.

Not bad for his first client meeting as senior sales director, he thought as he licked and sucked on his ice cream cone. Not bad at all.

When Jaime returned to his office on the twelfth floor he was eager to get the paperwork Oberyn and Ellaria had signed photocopied and delivered to the proper department for processing. Normally Peck would take care of this sort of thing, but Peck was still on his own lunch break for 15 more minutes and Jaime didn’t want to wait that long. So after a quick stop at his desk to file the business cards Oberyn and Ellaria had given him in his new rolodex, Jaime tossed his suit jacket over the back of his ergonomic chair and went in search of the photocopier.

The twelfth floor was much less populated right now, with most people who worked there eating lunch elsewhere, so Jaime was left to wander until he found a door that said “Copy Room” on it. He opened the door, which creaked like it needed to be oiled, and stepped inside. The door swung shut behind him with a groan.

Inside he found a small room with a large photocopier/fax machine in it, as well as three printers and a wall full of shelves covered in paper of every colour of the rainbow in both letter and legal sizes.

There was also someone else in the copy room with him. There was a man wearing a deep blue coverall kneeling in front of the photocopier/fax machine inspecting the fourth paper feeding tray with an open toolbox beside him.

“Will it take long to fix?” Jaime asked the man. Now that he had found the copy room on the twelfth floor he was confident he could find a copy room on another floor of the Stark Pots and Pans office building without much difficulty.

The man looked over his shoulder and Jaime gasped.

“Ad _damn_?!”

Addamn Marbrand had worked with Jaime as part of the Lannister Cookware Vault Guard for years, but he had left the job some years ago, and Jaime had lost contact with him in the years that followed.

For his part, Addamn did not look surprised to see Jaime.

“Jaime,” Addamn said as he placed his photocopier/fax machine tool down and stood up to look at Jaime. “It is not safe.”

“Since when was the kitchenware industry safe?” Jaime asked, unbothered by this warning. Perhaps Addamn had been out of the business too long if he’d forgotten the constant danger they had been in as guards of the Lannister Cookware Vault.

“I meant for you,” Addamn said. “Specifically.”

This did not concern Jaime either. He was a Lannister. He’d spent his whole life being a Lannister. He’d been in danger from the moment he was born into this business.

“You’re being watched,” Addamn said as he undid the top seven buttons of his coveralls and reached into a secret pocket over his left peck to pull out a wad of polaroids. “Look for yourself.”

Addamn fanned the polaroids across the open manual feeder tray of the photocopier/fax machine and Jaime stepped forward to stand beside him to take a look. They were certainly photos of Jaime. In one he was getting out of his new Stark Pots and Pans company car in his designated parking space that morning. There was one of him in the lobby, and several of him at his lunch meeting with Oberyn Martell and Ellaria Sand.

“You know as well I do that this business is full of spies,” Jaime said. He and Addamn had intercepted more than a few attempts to break into the Lannister vault from rival companies in their time there.

“This is different,” Addamn said. He had not done up any of the buttons of his coveralls and they were falling past his bare shoulder as he spoke.

“Why?” Jaime asked.

“Because this is you,” Addamn said. “This is you, Jaime Lannister, working for Stark Pots and Pans. Do you have any idea the kind of danger you’re in?” His coveralls were at his waist now. Jaime turned away from the photos of his lunch meeting to put his hand on Addamn’s stomach and then move it around to his ass. Addamn wasn’t wearing any underwear under his coveralls. Not even a thong.

Addamn growled like a wild tiger in the moonlight on a hot summer day before he shoved Jaime against the photocopier/fax machine and kissed him like he was trying to will him to see reason.

Jaime saw only pleasure instead, answering Addamn’s growl with a grunt of his own as he yanked Addamn closer and used both of his hands to shove Addamn’s coveralls so they were around his thighs, exposing his stiff cock. Jaime was grateful for the simplicity of the garment Addamn was wearing, as even with a prosthetic hand it was effortless for Jaime to get it out of the way.

Jaime dove to his knees, not willing to wait another second to get Addamn’s cock in his mouth. Whatever had caused the photocopier/fax machine to need maintenance today would have to wait. Addamn did not object to this unscheduled break from his scheduled work, and thrust into Jaime’s mouth in rhythm with every time Jaime squeezed his ass.

It had been too long since the two of them had done this, and for a moment Jaime was nostalgic for the many times they had dragged the Lannister gold thongs from each other’s bodies with their teeth. But this was no time for nostalgia, Jaime thought as Addamn tangled his toner-stained fingers into Jaime’s hair and pulled enough so Jaime was looking up at him here and now.

It did not take much longer for Addamn to come with a shout, spurting his essence all over Jaime’s tongue as Jaime happily lapped as his cock, refusing to let any of his juices go to waste.

Addamn pulled Jaime to his feet and kissed him sweetly, lifting him so he was sitting on top of the scanning surface of the photocopier/fax machine.

“You’re still in danger,” Addamn said. “They’re still watching you. As long as you’re in the business they will be watching you.”

“I know,” said Jaime. “But I am the senior sales director of Stark Pots and Pans now. The danger is just part of the job.”

“If you’re sure,” Addamn said as he rubbed Jaime’s length through his trousers.

“I’m sure,” Jaime said as he lifted his ass off the photocopier/fax machine enough for Addamn to pull down his pants enough to access his cock the way he had been accessing the inner-workings of the fourth paper feeding tray of the photocopier/fax machine when Jaime arrived in the copy room.

Addamn had to shuffle to get into position, given that his coveralls were still bunched around his knees, but then he had Jaime’s dick in his mouth and was swirling his tongue and humming an old song and everything was right.

Addamn pulled away right before Jaime was about to come and Jaime keened, desperate to finish as he lifted his hips, searching for contact. Addamn grabbed his hips with both hands and held him in place before he gave Jaime what he was craving.

When Addamn surged forward onto Jaime’s cock again his legs smacked the fourth paper feeding tray back into place. The photocopier/fax machine whirred back to life as Jaime came.

After they had both dressed Jaime glanced at the polaroids scattered around them. “Can I keep these?”

“Sure,” Addamn said as he ran diagnostics on the photocopier/fax machine to make sure it was in working order.

“Thank you,” Jaime said as he picked them up and tucked them into the pocket of his shirt. They would look great in his scrapbook.

Once Addamn had given Jaime the go-ahead, Jaime made two copies of the sales contract before he kissed Addamn goodbye and returned to his office. He gave two to Peck on his way to his office to send to the appropriate departments, filed the original in his second desk drawer, and checked his day planner.

The next thing on his itinerary was Brienne’s marketing meeting, but that wasn’t until 2pm. He had plenty of time before that to catch up on editing the upcoming strategy documents and reading the latest reports so that is what he did.

Ten minutes before Brienne’s marketing meeting that he’d been invited to sit in on, Peck called to let him know that Pod, Brienne’s personal assistant, had dropped something off for Jaime.


	8. Laser Focus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime attends Brienne's marketing meeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to slipsthrufingers for her ongoing support and for providing necessary perspective I obviously lacked when I sent her this chapter wondering if it was Rocky Enough.

The item that had been dropped off was an inter-office memo along with a standard 6 inch by 8 inch padded envelope. The memo was addressed To: Jaime Lannister, Senior Sales Director, From: Brienne Tarth, Marketing Executive and said:

_As per our earlier discussion, I hope you will be able to attend the marketing presentation today at 2pm in the mirrored ceiling boardroom._

Jaime returned to his desk and used his sword-shaped letter opener to open the padded envelope that had come with the memo and a wooden box tumbled into his lap. He picked it up and placed it on his desk beside his day planner to properly examine it.

It was a highly polished pine wood box with silver hinges. When he opened it there was a modestly sized butt plug resting on a pillowed surface. The inner lid of the box had a small black bottle fitted into it and tied in place with a blue ribbon and when Jaime read the label he gasped.

It was a bottle of Executive Personal Lubricant.

Unable to resist, he untied the ribbon, opened the bottle, and then poured a dab of the executive lube onto his right forearm. Then he put the bottle down beside the wooden box with the butt plug still resting inside it and pinched his thumb and forefinger in the lube.

It was silkier than his slipperiest dreams, more magnificent than any personal lubricant he’d ever used before. Jaime couldn’t wait to try it out, and the memo was clear:

Two o’clock. The mirrored ceiling boardroom.

So Jaime strode into the mirrored ceiling boardroom at precisely two and a half minutes to two o’clock.

The mirrored ceiling boardroom was called that because it had a mirrored ceiling, and Jaime glanced up as soon as he walked through the double doors. It must have cost a decent sum of money and been a real logistical nightmare to install because it was a single massive mirror that covered the entire ceiling rather than a more sensible selection of mirrored tiles. The large oak table in the centre of the room could comfortably seat 12, but could fit up to 20 in a pinch. There were already ten people seated at the table, with five on either side. Brienne was standing at the far end of the table. The chair on that side had been removed and tucked into the corner.

“This is Jaime Lannister,” Brienne announced to the people around the table. “He’s our new Senior Sales Director. He’ll be sitting in on our meeting this afternoon.”

There was a murmur of assent and Brienne gestured for Jaime to take his seat at the table. 

The flared base of the modestly sized butt plug was wide, but was made of silicone soft enough that it didn’t chafe between his ass cheeks as he made his way to the only empty seat. He sat on the chair at the end of the large boardroom table opposite where Brienne was set up with a pull-down screen and a ceiling mounted projector.

There were a brief set of introductions for his benefit, and he did his professional best to pay attention to the names of the people sitting around the table, but once they’d gone around the table he stopped trying to look at anyone but Brienne. He was only moments away from getting to see Brienne Tarth, Marketing Executive in action. By the time the lights dimmed and Brienne fired up her 32 slide powerpoint deck he was positively tingling with excitement, and the perfectly sized butt plug inside him only added to that special feeling.

Jaime watched in rapt attention as Brienne lay out the agenda for today’s presentation and the official overview of the Smith Day Sale marketing plan. She was only on the 2nd slide, but Jaime could tell it was a game-changer that would have the Lannister Cookware team struggling to get even close to her level. He grinned and shifted where he sat, tightening around the plug and enjoying the pleasure that throbbed through him. He swore Brienne noticed, but she was too professional to let his delight faze her as she used her remote to move to the next expertly designed slide.

The 10th slide included a graph and for the first time Brienne used the built in laser pointer in her remote to point out the stunning growth of sales year over year. As she followed the projected line up and up with the small red dot of her laser pointer the butt plug inside him began to vibrate.

Jaime froze, but the silicone inside him did not. And when he looked up at Brienne in shock! in alarm! she held eye contact just long enough to move her thumb and push a button on her remote.

The intensity of the vibration increased.

Jaime had to bite his lip to stop himself from making a less-than-professional noise. He had never seen a laser pointer/remote vibration controller once in his business life. He looked around the table, wondering if everyone was getting to enjoy this presentation on every level he was, but after a quick glance around the table and then again via the mirrored ceiling, it was clear he was alone in this experience. 

Brienne clicked to the next slide and continued talking about the Smith Day Sale targeted messaging while Jaime clenched and squirmed with bliss, determined to maintain his professional demeanour, but between Brienne’s incredibly concise and well-rounded marketing plan and the gentle but insistent vibration, it was getting more challenging by the second. At least the buzzy butt plug doing Brienne’s bidding was whisper quiet. He was determined to be quiet too.

The next slide was simple enough that she didn’t need to point anything out with her laser pointer, but inside of turning it off, she casually pointed it at the ceiling so the red dot reflected off the mirror so it landed on Jaime’s tie and then slide down to the now impressive bulge in his trousers as she adjusted the speed of vibration once again.

The next 20 slides passed in executive ecstasy. Brienne’s marketing strategy was brilliant next-level thinking, even more so than her ground-breaking holiday campaign. That alone would have had Jaime in a frenzy, but the fact that she kept adjusting the amount of extra stimulation he received as effortlessly as she was flipping through her powerpoint deck and addressing the room full of business colleagues made him feel like he’d already sold every pot and pan in the world

By the time Brienne wrapped up her proposal to unanimous agreement and a flurry of rapturous applause, Jaime was shuddering his way through aftershocks comparable to those of a major earthquake and his thong was definitely no longer up to professional dress code standards.

Jaime stayed in his chair as everyone else seated around the table stood and started to leave. He wanted to congratulate Brienne on such a splendid impactful presentation and he would prefer to do so without an audience.

“Don’t waste your time,” a man Jaime was fairly sure was called Hyle Hunt if he remembered the introductions correctly as he walked past where Jaime still sat. “She’s all business. And besides, you’re sales. She’s been burned by your kind before.”

What did that mean? Jaime wondered as he watched the man he was fairly sure was called Hyle leave the room, leaving Jaime alone in the room except for Brienne. He stood and approached where Brienne was packing her laptop into a deep chestnut brown leather briefcase.

“That was incredible,” Jaime said to Brienne. “You’re incredible.”

“Thank you.” she said, like the best meeting of his life was just all in a day’s work. Gods she was amazing. So professional. Jaime wanted to firmly shake her hand just to be sure she was real.

“Where did you get such a captivating laser pointer?” Jaime asked. His whole body was still hyper-sensitive and he was still throbbing around the butt plug and if Brienne were to push that button again he would surely burst.

“Oh this?” Brienne asked as she was tucking the remote into the front pocket of her briefcase. “I made it. It’s a prototype of course, I’m always looking to innovate. You know how it is. Business can be so same-old same-old if you aren’t careful.”

“Yes. Yes exactly.” Jaime said breathlessly. Then he raised his prosthetic hand and looked at it with a sigh. “I could certainly use something new.”

“I heard it was carefully crafted to be able to perfectly hold the handle of a pot or a pan,” Brienne said, not without curiosity, as she looked at his prosthetic more closely.

“It was,” Jaime said. “Hardly innovative. The very definition of same-old same-old.”

“I’d be happy to help you brainstorm innovative alternatives. I’m sure we can come up with something to give you a new competitive edge,” Brienne offered. “If you’re interested.”

“Yes!” Jaime exclaimed. “Please!”

“Excellent. But right now you’ll have to excuse me. I have another meeting to get to,” Brienne said. “I’m sure you understand.”

“Yes of course,” Jaime said. He understood perfectly. Professional and punctual. All business.

Brienne.


	9. The Wolf Pelt Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime attends his meeting with the CEO of Stark Pots and Pans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks, as always, to slipsthrufingers for her encouragement (and artwork!!!) and also to sameboots, who replied to my question asking for possible alternatives to the Steeles Pots and Pans Leather Room with her absolutely brilliant suggestion of "The Wolf Pelt Room".

After a quick trip down to the parking garage to retrieve the emergency thong Jaime always kept in the glovebox of his company car and a subsequent trip to one of the executive restrooms to change and clean up, he returned to his office. He sat in his ergonomic chair, noting the slight change in his overall comfort as he considered investing in a new batch of emergency thongs. The onyx thong he was now wearing would do in a pinch, but it was hardly every day wear for a senior sales director. He added a reminder to his calendar before he returned the freshly cleaned butt plug to its resting place atop the pillowed surface of the wooden box. He opted to keep the executive personal lubricant on his person and tucked it into the left pocket of his suit jacket before he placed the wooden box in the top left drawer of his desk for safe keeping.

He busied himself with the paperwork Peck had dropped off while Jaime was attending Brienne’s meeting until Peck knocked on his door to give him a ten minute warning that his scheduled meeting time with Dr. Catelyn Stark was fast approaching. 

Jaime closed the open folder on his desk, thanked Peck, and then made his way towards the elevator. Dr. Stark’s office was on the thirteenth floor, and Jaime had not been there yet. 

When Jaime stepped off the elevator he was greeted by an older woman seated behind a large desk in a massive lobby. 

“I have an appointment to see Dr. Stark at 3:30,” Jaime informed her. “I am Jaime Lannister, the new Senior Sales Director.”

“Yes of course,” the woman said. “Dr. Stark is just wrapping up her previous meeting, but she indicated that you are welcome to head in when you arrive. It’s just through that door there.”

She pointed to the single door at the end of the massive lobby. Jaime thanked her and approached the door. 

When he opened the door he was greeted by a long straight hallway with no other doors except one at the other end of the long hall. With no other instructions to follow, he continued straight until he reached the door and knocked raptly upon it. 

“Come in,” said a voice from the other side.

When Jaime opened the door he found himself stepping into a large perfectly round room and he looked around in wonder at the high ceilings and the large window that wrapped around most of the perimeter until his eyes landed on Dr. Stark and Brienne Tarth, who were just wrapping up their meeting. Dr. Catelyn Stark’s hand was down the front of Brienne’s trousers and Brienne was leaning down to kiss her softly. 

“Jaime Lannister,” Dr. Stark said after a moment. “Welcome. I want to introduce you to Brienne Tarth, our most senior marketing executive.”

“We’ve met,” both Jaime and Brienne said in unison.

“Is that so?” Dr. Catelyn Stark said, now doing up the buttons of Brienne’s perfectly tailored shirt. “Excellent. I should like to arrange a meeting with both of you this week. I’ll have my assistant cross-reference our schedules.“

“That would be great,” Jaime replied, watching as Brienne tied up her tie in a full windsor knot and then moved her hands out of the way to let Catelyn be the one to straighten it into the perfect place at her neck. “I’ll make sure that Peck knows to prioritize it.”

“Good,” Dr. Stark said. “Brienne, what does your week look like?”

“Busy, as always,” Brienne replied. “But Pod will figure it out. I’d hate to miss such an important meeting.”

“Yes,” Dr. Stark agreed. “The sooner we coordinate our sales approach with our marketing strategy in this turbulent time, the better.”

“Agreed,” Jaime and Brienne both said. The kitchenware market was hot but volatile, as they both knew better than most. 

Then Brienne continued, “On that note, I must be going. We’ll be in touch.” she said to Dr. Stark. As she walked back towards the door to the hallway she nodded at Jaime and said “Jaime”, which Jaime understood to be her wishing him luck during his first meeting with the CEO of Stark Pots and Pans. Not that he needed luck, this was business, but he appreciated the gesture all the same as he watched Brienne. 

It wasn’t until Brienne opened the door and Jaime saw the long straight hallway from the perspective of the perfectly round room did it click into place. “Brilliant,” he breathed. Even his father had never had the idea to build his office in the shape of a pot or pan. Lannister Cookware had been underestimating Stark Pots and Pans for years! When Jaime turned back to Dr. Stark after the door was closed and they were alone in her pan-shaped office and she was watching him.

“So,” she said coolly. “Jaime Lannister, Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans.”

“That’s me,” he replied. 

“Yes,” she replied. “It is. Curious how things work out, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Jaime nodded. 

“You could have worked anywhere,” she said as she took a few steps towards him. “With business talent like yours, anyone would have been thrilled to have you on their staff. Why did you pick here?”

Jaime thought about it before he answered, struggling to put the swell of overwhelming feelings he had towards the kitchenware business into words.

“Because I belong in the pots and pans business, and not because of my family. I spent so long avoiding the sales team at Lannister Cookware, and I thought it was because I didn’t want to be part of the business, but I realize now I just didn’t want to be part of _their_ business,” Jaime said, speaking from the heart because that is where his answer came from. “Does that make sense?”

“Yes Jaime,” Dr. Stark said, her tone warming. “It certainly does.”

She walked over to the curved wall opposite the 200 degree floor to ceiling window that wrapped around most of the office to a long bookshelf that had been fitted to fit snugly against the curvature of the room. She reached for a large leather bound book with a title embossed in silver on the spine and tilted it towards her and the bookshelf swung open into a secret room, “If you’ll follow me please.”

“This,” Dr. Stark said once Jaime had followed her into the secret room and the bookshelf swung back into place behind them, “is the Wolf Pelt Room.”

The Wolf Pelt Room needed no introduction, but Jaime was glad for it all the same. The cushioned floor was completely covered in wolf pelts, as were the walls and the ceiling. On the far wall was a fireplace with a fire crackling merrily away. The walls adjacent the fire each had five pewter wolf heads mounted on them, each wolf head holding a different item. Jaime’s gaze was immediately drawn to the wolf head third from right that had a harness with a large black dildo hanging from the pewter wolf’s bottom teeth before he looked back to Dr. Stark. 

“No Lannister has ever set foot in the Wolf Pelt Room before,” she said. 

“It’s an honour Dr. Stark,” Jaime replied, still looking around and taking in the sight of the CEO of Stark Pots and Pans standing in the legendary Wolf Pelt Room, fully aware of what this moment meant for the legacy of both of their families and for the kitchenware industry as a whole. 

“There is no need for formalities between us,” she replied. “My senior staff are not expected to call me anything but my name.”

“Yes Catelyn.”

“That’s better,” Catelyn replied before she beckoned him to her.

She stripped him naked, starting at his shoes and working her way up to his tie. Jaime couldn’t help but wiggle his toes in the wolf fur beneath his bare feet as she placed his clothes in a neat pile near the secret entrance to the Wolf Pelt Room. When Catelyn returned to him she was already unbuttoning her shirt, which left him to undo the zipper on her skirt so she could step out of it. She sat to remove her heels, and Jaime joined her on the expanse of wolf pelts, undoing the straps of her left shoe and then tossing it aside. 

When they were both extremely naked they rolled and tumbled their way across the padded wolf-pelted floor in a tangle of limbs and bare skin, finally coming to a stop in front of the fireplace on a particularly soft patch of pelts. Jaime wasted no time at all burying his face between Catelyn’s thighs to taste her most wild parts, here in the deepest den of her pots and pans empire.

While Jaime feasted Catelyn writhed against the wolf fur beneath her as she pushed up against Jaime’s eager mouth until she came with a long low hum of satisfaction. Jaime rolled off to the side of her, letting himself revel in the feel of the pelts against his sensitive skin as he thought about what his family would think of how he was conducting business now. He’d never allowed himself to consider the thought of the Wolf Pelt Room with any seriousness back when he was at Lannister Cookware, but now that he was here… He rubbed his arms back and forth through the fur where he lay, thinking of how he thought it little more than a rumour or a metaphor until Catelyn rolled so she was facing him.

“So Jaime Lannister,” she said as she reached for him, first his chest, then his left bicep, and then his cock. “As this is your first time in the Wolf Pelt Room, why don’t you choose how you’d like this to go?” As she said this she casually stroked him and he squeezed his eyes shut. 

“I’d be perfectly happy with this,” he gasped. Never in his wildest dreams had he expected his first business meeting with the CEO of Stark Pots and Pans to go so well.

“Now now, I saw you looking around when we came in,” Catelyn said. “What caught your eye?” 

She gave his dick a little squeeze and then gave his ass a little pat and then pulled her hand away. Jaime opened his eyes. She was watching him. She was watching him as he took an unnecessary look around the various items held by the pewter wolf heads before his eyes landed where they had when he first walked in. 

“Bring it here,” Catelyn said. So Jaime did, walking past the wolf head with a variety of cock rings on its teeth, and the wolf head with the spreader bar held in its mouth like a stick it found in the woods, and even past the wolf head with a world-class vibrator on its tongue. 

He retrieved the harness with the big black dildo and then went to his discarded trousers to collect the bottle of Executive Personal Lubricant and then returned to where Catelyn was waiting for him in front of the fire. 

“Excellent choice,” she said as he gave her the leather harness and accompanying dildo. Then he handed her the bottle of lube and she looked at it and grinned with amused recognition. “Oh I see you really have met Brienne.”

Jaime laughed.

“Yes,” he said. “I have.”

“I can’t wait to see what work you two can accomplish together,” Catelyn said as Jaime slid onto his stomach and she uncapped the lube. “I’m sure your future collaborations will be invigorating for the company.”

“Yes,” Jaime agreed as Catelyn drizzled lube over his ass like she was decorating a sundae. With Brienne’s marketing and his sales techniques working together under the thoughtful direction of Dr. Catelyn Stark, the kitchenware business would never be the same. 

And not much longer later, when Jaime lay sprawled face down on the floor sandwiched between the wolf pelts beneath him and Dr. Catelyn Stark herself, his ass slick with Executive Personal Lubricant and stretched around a dildo retrieved from a pewter wolf head he knew, beyond a doubt, that he truly was the Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans. 


	10. Messages Sent, Loud and Clear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime gets a phone call.

As Jaime was walking back to his office his front right suit jacket pocket started to vibrate. His first thought was that a vibrator from the Wolf Pelt Room had fallen into his pocket from one of the pewter wolf heads while he was otherwise occupied, but as he reached his left hand across his body to reach into the pocket what he found was a phone vibrating with an incoming call, which was odd because it was not his phone.

Jaime looked at the phone in his hand and then felt his front left pocket of his trousers where he always kept his phone for easy access. His phone was still there, but the phone in his hand was still vibrating.

Jaime glanced at Peck, who was chastely kissing the back of Pia’s hand, on his way into his office and then he closed the door and went over to his desk. The call was still incoming.

He did not know whose phone this was or why it was in his pocket or why he was being called, but he knew the pots and pans business. He needed to be careful, but he also needed to know what was going on, so he answered the phone.

He did not use his usual professional greeting. He didn’t even say his name. Instead he just said, “Hello?”

“Jaime!” said a familiar voice on the other end of the line. “How’s your first day going?”

“What do you want Tyrion?” Jaime demanded. He didn’t have time for his brother’s games. Tyrion could have easily messaged or emailed Jaime like a regular human being to ask how his day was going but instead he had planted a burner phone on him.

“Can’t I call my brother and ask how his first day is going?” Tyrion asked.

“Not when you’re calling a burner phone!”

“I couldn’t call yours,” Tyrion replied with the easy charm that made him so good at what he did for Lannister Cookware. “You know what this business is like. Which brings me back to my question. How is your first day at Stark Pots and Pans going?”

“Fine,” Jaime said tersely. “But it is none of your business how my business is going.”

“Is it true you made it into the Wolf Pelt Room already?” Tyrion asked. “I have to hand it to you Jaime, I never thought you had it in you, but you’ve accomplished more in one day than the last 40 years of corporate espionage combined. You’ll be CEO of Lannister Cookware in no time if you manage to destroy Stark Pots and Pans from the inside. Father would be so proud.”

“Father has nothing to do with this! And I have no desire to be anything but an ex-employee of Lannister Cookware,” Jaime growled into the burner phone.

“Jaime, it’s me,” Tyrion said, annoyingly calm and so so smug. “You may have fooled everyone else, but we’re Lannisters. You’ll need my help to—”

“I don’t need your help! I don’t need anything from you except for you to leave me alone!”

“You can drop the act any time,” Tyrion said with a yawn. “This line is secure, and Bronn intercepted your message to Cersei.”

“What message?! I didn’t send a message!?”

“Give it up Jaime. I have a copy of the fax right here.”

“What fax?” Jaime said, utterly bewildered. “I didn’t send a fax.”

“Oh, so it’s someone else’s naked golden ass I’m looking at then?” Tyrion asked lightly.

Jaime’s head spun. When the photocopier/fax machine came back to life it must have completed the fax it had been trying to send when it had jammed, which meant that someone in Stark Pots and Pans had been trying to get a message to Cersei. But who?! And why?! And what were they trying to send to her??!! Jaime needed to get to the bottom of this as soon as possible. 

“It’s my ass, but it’s not my message. I’ve told you a million time, I have no interest in Lannister Cookware beyond the fact that you are our primary competition in the kitchenware market.”

“Jaime, Jaime, Jaime—”

“I am Jaime Lannister!” he declared. “And I am the Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans!!!!!!”

And then Jaime threw the burner phone to the ground and smashed it to pieces with his rolodex to make sure Tyrion got the message.

After Jaime had swept up the debris from the phone and tipped it into the wastepaper basket to the left of his desk, he sat in his ergonomic chair and sighed deeply. He knew what he was getting into, working in the kitchenware business, but it was still startling to have the reality of how much work he had to do come crashing down upon him in such brutal fashion. 

He picked up the pen from the silver pen holder on his desk and opened the red folder on his desk and got to work. 

So compelling was the report that it was much later when Jaime looked over at the phone on his desk to check the time. It was 5:43pm, well past the time he was expected to stay in the office. He rubbed his face and sighed. The rest of this paperwork would have to wait, he thought as he closed the folder and returned the pen to the silver pen holder. 

He was putting on his suit jacket to leave for the day when he realized that the message light on his desk phone was blinking. When had that happened? he wondered as he reached for the phone to check it. Had he been so consumed with his business that he hadn’t noticed the phone ring? Had Peck directed the caller straight to voicemail? Was the voicemail old and Jaime just hadn’t noticed it all day in his flurry of activity on his first day? He would soon find out.

He pressed 1 to hear his new message and the message began to play: 

“Hi Jaime, it’s Brienne Tarth. Please drop by my office when you’re done for the day. I have some business to discuss with you.”


	11. An Accessory for Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime goes to Brienne's office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to slipsthrufingers for putting up with me and reading my nonsense even when I write fics like this at breakneck speed.
> 
> And to everyone who made it this far on this Rocky-esque adventure, congrats! I hope you all learned some valuable things about business and also yourself along the way. I know I did.

The 12th floor was nearly deserted when Jaime all but bounded out of his office. He hoped Brienne was still here. He didn’t mean to stay so late himself, but the paperwork was so all-consuming he’d lost track of time. And if he had noticed the blinking light that indicated he had a voicemail he would have gone to see Brienne much earlier.

Peck was long gone, and Jaime could see no one else to ask where Brienne’s office was, so he would just have to look for it. His office already had his name on it, so hers would too. He wasn’t certain where to start, beyond assuming her office was also on the 12th floor, but given her high power position and excellent standing within the company he could only assume it was a nice one. Probably a spacious corner office like his own.

He opted to search the other three corner offices in a counter-clockwise direction. The first office he found was not Brienne’s, but the second corner office he came across, the one directly across the building from his own, had an exquisite “Brienne Tarth, Marketing Executive” sign on the door.

The desk and chair where Pod (Brienne’s assistant) would sit was empty. He, like Peck and Pia and all of the other assistants had gone home for the night. But the light was still on in Brienne’s office so Jaime strode forward and knocked three times.

Brienne opened the door to her office. She had removed her blazer and loosened her tie and rolled up the sleeves of her dress shirt, revealing her freckled forearms. The overall effect was so affecting that Jaime just stared up at her for a long moment.

“I just got your message,” Jaime finally said. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes, do come in,” Brienne said as she stepped aside to let him in.

Her corner office was stunning, even bigger than his and the very image of modern professionalism, all crisp lines and clear of clutter. He would have thought it a showroom for first class office supplies if it were not for the secondary desk. She had two desks: one large mahogany one, not unlike his own but even more expansive. It was a beautiful desk, but it was the other desk up against one of the large windows overlooking the surrounding area that compelled Jaime. That one was a drafting station and workbench, and obviously where she had just risen from. He could see various sketches and creative marketing ideas along with various prototypes in various stages of completion she was working on.

Jaime was still trying to drink in everything about her work environment when Brienne spoke.

“I got to thinking about what you said about your hand being too same-old same-old for your liking and long story short, I ended up making something this afternoon while I was on a call with my junior team brainstorming ideas for the upcoming line of pots and pans. I hope you don’t mind,” she said as she opened the top right drawer of her work bench desk and reached into it. “It helps me think.”

“I don’t mind at all!” Jaime exclaimed, barely able to contain himself, wondering what she was about to pull out of her drawer.

When Brienne turned back to him she was holding a wrist-mountable dark green dildo. The craftsmanship she had put into the handmade cuff that would hold the dildo in place on the end of his arm was both functional and fashionable and decorated with intricate and delicate details. His current prosthetic had nothing on what she was showing him.

“It’s beautiful!” he gasped.

“It’s just a prototype, a proof of concept if you will,” she said, as if this, the most beautiful and thoughtful of gifts, was little more than a company pen that was handed out by the handful. “This is just a standard high quality dildo made of body safe medical grade silicone, but with more time I could easily add vibration or suction or lighting, or pretty much anything else you can dream off. The sky’s the limit. Oh, and obviously the angle is adjustable,” Brienne added, grasping the dildo to demonstrate.

“I don’t know what to say,” Jaime said, taking the dildo and wrist harness she held out to him to admire it more closely.

“I’ll need you to try it on sometime and let me know how it fits,” Brienne said. “You can let me know whenever you get to it and then bring it back so I can make the adjustments.”

“Can I try it on now?” he asked.

“If you’d like.”

“I’d love to!” Jaime said, tucking the harness under his arm to use his hand to reach for his prosthetic hand. He’d done it thousands of times, but flustered as he was by Brienne and the perfect gift, he fumbled and swore and nearly dropped the gift she had given him.

“Can I help?” Brienne asked. “Or you can have a seat on my desk and put the dildo down so you don’t have to hold everything at once.”

“Thanks,” Jaime replied gratefully. “Both would be great.”

Together they walked over to her large desk, (the one that wasn’t covered in sketches and prototypes) and Jaime took off his suit jacket and hopped on to it. He placed the dildo and wrist harness beside him and rolled up his right sleeve before he went back to work removing his prosthetic hand.

Usually he was wary of removing his hand in front of people, but he didn’t feel awkward at all as he set his old same-old same-old prosthetic hand on Brienne’s desk.

“May I?” Brienne asked as she gestured to the prototype she had made. “Or would you rather do it yourself?”

“Please,” he said, holding out his right arm to her. “By all means.”

As Brienne reached for the dildo and wrist harness Jaime followed the line of her arm down and across the expansive desk.

“Your desk is quite something,” Jaime said, hoping to distract himself from how his body was starting to tingle in anticipation of Brienne touching him. “A grown man could lie comfortably on it with room to spare!”

Brienne grinned. “I’ve never tested that, but you are welcome to be the first.”

Jaime laughed. But Brienne was still smiling at him, her eyes sparkling the way they had been when she pressed that particular button on her laser pointer earlier that afternoon so Jaime lay down, lifted his legs, and rotated 90 degrees so he was lying on his back in the middle of Brienne’s large desk.

“I was right,” he said. “A grown man can like comfortably on your desk.”

“With room to spare,” Brienne pointed out as she too climbed up onto the desk and then straddled his hips. She was holding the dildo wrist harness prototype in her left hand when she added, “Ready?”

Jaime nodded because he did not have any words.

Brienne carefully adjusted the straps of the wrist cuff she had made before she slid it over his wrist. She tightened the straps, checking in with Jaime repeatedly while she asked him to let her know if anything was uncomfortable or applying uncomfortable pressure anywhere. As she did this, her hips moved against his and he grunted.

“Too tight?” she asked.

“Yes,” Jaime said without thinking, absentmindedly tugging his tie loose. “No.” he corrected. His thong and boxer-briefs and trousers were feeling too tight but his wrist was perfectly comfortable.

“Where are my manners?” Brienne asked in wonderment, removing his tie completely and tossing it over her shoulder onto the floor before shifting her attention to his belt. She pulled down his trousers and then his boxer-briefs and finally his thong, before she stood up on her desk and removed her own trousers and azure thong in one motion. Then she returned to where she had been straddling him, this time lowering herself onto his very hard cock, enveloping him with her wet heat. “Better?” she asked.

Jaime nodded, “Much.”

“Good,” Brienne said, grinding back and forth slightly and humming with pleasure before she held out her hands and he lifted his right arm so she could finish her adjustments.

This time as she worked she moved her hips absentmindedly as she did so.

“I think we’re almost there,” she said, looking closely at the prototype as she made minor adjustments. “How’s that feeling?”

“Great,” he said. And it was. Everything about this was great and his cock was buried inside her and he was watching her adjust the straps with one of her hands. She had obviously designed it to be easy for him to apply, adjust, and remove himself without any difficulty. He was touched by her thoughtfulness, and also by her gentle touch as her finger brushed across the scarred skin of his wrist with care.

“There,” she said as she made the final adjustment and removed her hands. “How’s that?”

“It’s perfect!” Jaime admired the dildo on the end of his wrist and then used his left hand to test the adjustable angle feature, all the while Brienne fucked herself casually on his dick.

“Just think of the business opportunities this will open up,” Brienne said. “And once we figure out what sorts of features and attachments you’ll find most compatible with your sales style, it will be the perfect accessory for business.”

“Right,” Jaime said, lost in thought and pleasure and in Brienne’s big blue eyes. “Business.”

“Speaking of,” Brienne said, leaning forward to open the top middle drawer of her desk and lifting herself off his cock in the process. When she sat back up she was holding her own bottle of Executive Personal Lubricant. “It seems like as good a time as any for a test run?”

“Yes,” Jaime agreed. He ran the dildo up her thigh and against her clit, testing the weight and balance of his new prosthetic as much as he was testing the way Brienne responded to it. The prototype was performing well by all measurable metrics.

Brienne opened the bottle of Executive Personal Lubricant and poured some into her right hand, using her fingers to warm it before she reached down and spread it over his cock. Once his length was suitably slathered in the splendidly slick substance Brienne shifted forward and slid slowly back down onto him, this time taking his cock in her ass as he continued to rub the dildo against her.

Once she was settled in place they both asked “How’s that?” at the same time.

They both laughed, but it was Brienne who answered first, “It’s very good. But I think there’s room for improvement.”

“I should hope so,” Jaime replied, teasing the tip of the dildo against her front hole. Part of what made her such an excellent business executive was that she was always striving for improvement. “Ready for more?”

“Please,” Brienne said.

It took some arranging, Brienne lifting and tilting her hips just so, and Jaime adjusting the angle of the dildo in the wrist harness and figuring out how to comfortably and effectively position his arm, but soon Brienne was lowering her ass back all the way onto his cock as the dildo slid into place in her vagina.

He could feel the smooth hard length of the dildo against his own hard length, side by side inside her through her inner walls and Brienne was gasping and trembling with pleasure as she shifted above and around him looking like some sort of executive god and something far more powerful all at once as she gasped his name.

It did not take long for them to find their rhythm, working together like a well-oiled machine to maximize pleasure the way they were both so good at maximizing profits.

And when she was desperately close Jaime used his thumb to caress her clit just so and soon she clenched around him and his dildo like the firmest most professional hand shake as she came, inviting Jaime to accompany her orgasm with his own.

There were a few shaky moments where all they could do was lie there on her desk, awe-inspired and elated before they began the process of returning themselves and her desk to a professional state.

“If you don’t have anything scheduled right now,” Brienne said as she was re-tying her tie around her neck. “Do you want to go get something to eat?”

“More business to discuss?” Jaime asked as he did up his belt and tucked in his shirt. It wasn’t uncommon for colleagues to gather at a restaurant or bar to welcome someone to the company.

“No,” Brienne said, smiling at him as she lifted her now tied tie off off her neck and over her head and then placed it around his neck and straightened it into place. “Pleasure.”

Jaime laughed and then stood on his tippy toes to kiss her before he followed her towards the elevator.

Jaime knew his first day as the Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans was over, but his first night as the Senior Sales Director of Stark Pots and Pans was just getting started.


End file.
